Panto at Wimbledon Theatre

Throw in generic, primary-colour scenery, by-the-yard tunes, a handful of weak references to political figures and, bingo, you have the sort of brash, insistent japery that makes a reliable December profit for many second-division theatres

Wimbledon’s routine event movie stars American Verne Troyer, who is bit bigger than a magnum of claret

Wimbledon’s routine event movie stars American Verne Troyer, who is bit bigger than a magnum of claret.

His pirate character is named Lofty.

He's accompanied by Marcus Brigstocke, a politically correct stand-up, and Jarred Christmas time, a bearded New Zealander who seems on panel programs.

Throw in general, primary-colour views, by-the-yard tunes, a handful of poor references to political figures and, bingo, you have the type of brash, insistent japery which makes a reliable December revenue for a lot of second-division theatres.

Mr Brigstocke annoys me personally on radio, but here makes an audio Captain Hook. Mr Christmas is tireless.

Mr Troyer commands the stage by their shortness. However it is all pretty idle and hellishly loud.

Peter Pan fails (Apollo Theatre, London)

Verdict: Slapstick for beginners

Rating:

Peter Pan fails is far jollier, though anyone who has heard of Enjoy That fails, from same ensemble, may feel a structure has been used thin. There’s absolutely nothing slight about any of it but it is through with power and a crescendo of insanity.

A troupe of beginners is gaining Peter Pan. Things are getting awry even while the viewers settles — feverish-eyed electricians attempting to run a cable through the stalls, barging after dark punters.

Once the lights dim, lines tend to be lost, a fat Nanny gets caught when you look at the dog flap, costumes get fire, etc. But director Adam Meggido will not allow a sense of normality to produce before it is shattered by catastrophe. Modern audience interest spans demand instant gratification.

Peter Pan fails is far jollier, though whoever has heard of Enjoy That Goes Wrong, from the same ensemble, may feel a format is being worn slim. There’s absolutely nothing discreet about this but it is done with energy and a crescendo of madness

The cast, led by skilled Henry Shields — which works some level in to the lunacy — keep it going. Congratulations Dave Hearn, Charlie Russell, Henry Lewis as well as others.

Weights plummet from on high, planks smash into faces, props failure alarmingly near necks and hands and limbs, plus some accomplished tumbling is necessary. One dreads to think about the risk-assessment types the producers had to complete.

The notion of a play going incorrect has been done prior to, maybe not least in Kenneth Branagh’s current revival of Terence Rattigan’s Harlequinade (that is in fact much more deft and funny).

I reach for the 4th celebrity since it does the company for viewers desiring an uncomplicated evening of actual disaster and considering that the stars toss by themselves involved with it with therefore small regard because of their very own mutilation.